The Way of the Dufus

The Way of the Dufus

We boys have been living in The House for a year and a half now, and only three weeks ago did I make the discovery:

There’s a built-in cutting board under the counter.

I was understandably surprised and excited at the discovery.

Even when I remembered that the same thing had happened when I lived in John and Tim’s Bancroft apartment for a summer (apparently I am not sufficiently skilled in the …



My mom caught me lugging the 50 pound, 25-year-old red vacuum up the garage stairs.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

“Getting this vacuum,” I said.

“Why? What are you cleaning?”

“Well, I, um . . .”

“Are you gonna use the Flowbee?”

I looked away, avoiding her eyes. “. . . Maybe.” There was no use denying it.

“You and your dad. I just don’t understand it. I would never use …